So folks keep asking me about retrograde Venus and I have to admit that I have been a bit obsessed thinking about her as I find myself fully in the throes of primary relationship restructuring. It also makes me rather hesitant to say anything for whatever I do is just covered in my own projections. Though I suspect that this is perhaps always the case, so consider yourselves fairly warned dear reader!

I could throw out all the pat ideas that this time is about re-examining yourself within relational structures so that you might come to a clearer and more integrated understanding of you what you need to thrive and grow. That’s helpful isn’t it? Or how ‘bout more starkly put: this is a time when your shit is in your face and there is no avoiding it, and how other people are going to help you become painfully aware of all the ways you disconnect.  Steven Forrest bullets Venus aim as the need to build rapport or the drive to create bridges between self and other. So an easy way to look at a retrograde Venus is to think about what is necessary to first create that rapport with yourself so that you can effectively engage with other.

I had a Zen teacher who was fond of saying that 90% of everything you experience is projection and while one might find many an argument with that, it does get us thinking in the right direction in terms of learning how to activate high Venus energies. If we are to engage others effectively it is necessary to understand that within ourselves which requires the presence of someone to project upon. Where Venus lands in your chart can tell you a lot about this. Where transiting Venus hits in your chart, you are going to see those areas and ways of being vibrated upon. We all hunger to be cherished or admired or thought well of. That is kind of hardwired into the human pack animal brain. We need our tribe, our pack in order to survive. Whether this is true or not in the modern world is another topic, the bottom line is that this is a vibration we carry in our emotional and psychological DNA, and part of that is seen through our Venus. A partial result of this is that with a Venus function comes something of an ability to be a chameleon. For some folks this skill is very strong and for others it is muted, but we all do it, we all play with the different facets of ourselves, our different ways of being and we work them to create a sense of harmony with those people from whom we feel connected to or desirous of. Part of why we build bridges is because it creates a sense of safety and of belonging and of self-worth. It is a form of power. This is what this energy signature is in part about. And we all have a Venus.

Retrograde Venus I think, as one of its highest openings can be a time when we can go through this dance and watch it from the inside. It seems that our sticky patterns are incredibly self-evident as is our fundamental understanding that there is a separation between self and other that needs be navigated if we are to feel whole. Geez, what do you do with all of this information? How do you not just spin your wheels with it all and make a mess of whatever is going on for you on the relationship front? In Capricorn I think the insights we come to are going to feel very practical, very self- sustaining and very bare bones. It can be an energy that leaves us deciding to just live off rice and beans and taking a certain pride and comfort in that. A retrograde Venus in Capricorn has the feeling of cutting away the fat… of peeling aside the cushion of self-deception and fantasy that we tend to use to protect our deeper more vulnerable selves. Venus in Capricorn retrograde hitting any sensitive area of your chart is going to say “enough already! Let’s get honest about meeting my own needs on this” High Capricorn energy is always the energy of integrity between body mind and spirit and it does not feel an over compelling urge to be nice about it. It’s just factual. This can be really hard on those around us, but I think more deeply this retrograde action calls us to really see how hard it is on ourselves; as we examine what is necessary and what is not, we will inevitably come face to face with some deep pains and shadow places those needs have arisen from. We have the opportunity to look at these things again and perhaps challenge and examine our own ideas of what we believe we need and why.

As this month progresses Venus will retrace her steps taking on Mercury, then the Sun and lastly Pluto as dance partners… How lovely. She weaves a pattern: first engaging the mind and the understanding, working with energies of communication, and then allowing that to filter into consciousness and the more complicated territory of ego and ego projections, and lastly leaning into energies of power struggles and hopefully deep messy truths that are the real doorways for rebirth and regeneration. Anyone feeling retrograde Venus strongly is going to be saying WHAT?! A whole month of this?! And it sounds like it may get worse!!! Wasn’t the last week enough already?  While at the same time if you are really being honest, I’ll bet you also know that what you have brushed upon this past week will require much more than one short month to really get a handle on.

What inside of you needs to be dusted off and brought into the light? What within you needs some polishing? What needs to be sought and aimed for within yourself so that the bridges you build with people have some hope of longevity and sustainability? What needs to change so that the relationship can last? Is it possible? Are your bare bones needs being met and whose responsibility is it to meet those needs in the first place? What is your soul hungry for and how do you go about feeding it? These are complicated questions that deserve to be sifted and sat with. Try not to act rashly now. Try to let this month unfold and pay attention and keep bringing the question back down into yourself.  Low end Capricorn can get pinched off and isolated, low end Venus can blame the other and want to punish. We can turn those low end energies on ourselves as well as other people. Try to just try to be as honest as you can about your own complexity and all the wounds and strengths that go into that. Be honest with yourself about your needs and where they grow from… and what fears and shadows you might need to own truly to see that clearly. Try to bring in a lot of compassion and forgiveness. Allow yourself to be wrong or clueless or less than optimal. Try to engage yourself from a place of lover. Ask yourself this: What about my own ideas would need to change or be let go of for me to Fall In Love With Myself? Can you see yourself from the place of the lover…seeing all the sundry bits, especially those parts that you keep tucked away?

This is a really blessed time when we can bring necessary healing to lives if we so choose. That is the point. We can use this retrograde Venus in Capricorn as a time to feel fundamentally alienated and alone; we can sing that chorus of separateness, but we can also choose to use the insights that perspective might offer us to recognize the ways we need to do some inner work to heal our spirits so that we can build appropriate bridges, so that we can strengthen our bonds on fundamental levels. In order for our relationships to mature and thrive, we need to learn about our own needs and own them. Being honest is only really part of that. We must take responsibility. We cannot be honest if we have not looked deeply into our own needs and owned the responsibility for attending to them.

Is this what retrograde Venus is really about or am I just projecting my own process onto the symbols? Who knows… look at your own life and your own processes at this time and see if it holds any water. Send me your comments. I would welcome any insights!